Nothing can annoy ya like a case of paranoia—cyberstalking!

The title to this blog post should be sung to the tune of ” Carolina in the Morning” if you want to get the full effect.  In the wake of my reblog last night about sociopaths, and how they operate in the world, I woke up to a few new followers to my blog.  Yippee!  A new follower or two to my blog almost always has me over the moon, because this blog is my baby.

Yet, I find that I am only partially over the moon because I know that one of the people following me did not just happen upon my blog and fall in love with it.  I know she is here to watch my every move, or word, more to the point.  Ah, well, what to do?  What I do is to say welcome one and all!  (Then behind the scenes I add a name and email and blog link to my “Comments that must be always moderated list and my blacklist.)  Then I go about my day, which I have been doing.  I ran some errands, and I took a stroll in the woods to collect kindling, because it is just plain gorgeous out there!

Gorgeous, I tell you!

However, how I go about my day has changed to a certain extent recently and that irritates me.  I lock my door all of the time now.  In all of my life I have never done that before.  I used to live in a big house full of hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of antiques and jewelry and I never locked my door.  I also lock my car now.  I never lock my car, because the one time I did lock my car, some 30 years ago, it got stolen.  True story.  It was the summer before my last year of college and I was living in Seattle and working as a waitress at an airport hotel.  I drove an old beater that had a homemade paint job, and I affectionately called it The Circus Wagon.

I had given someone I worked with a lift to work that night.  We both worked nights.  We got out of the car and when it was clear I was not locking my car, he said, “You need to lock your car.  You are not in Montana anymore.  This is Seattle.  Go lock your car.”  So I did.  The next morning at 7:30 a.m. when I wandered sleepily out to get in my car and head home it was gone.   I wandered and wandered through the enormous parking lot until the reality dawned on me.  My locked car was gone.  I never saw it again.  I also never locked my car again.

My oldest daughter went to visit her then boyfriend, now husband, a couple of years back and parked her car in a park and ride and locked it.  When she got back after her visit, her driver’s side window was smashed in, and all they had taken were her sunglasses.  They were Mui Mui–I had gotten them for her on eBay for a steal in excellent used condition, but as I told her, had you left you doors unlocked, they could have just opened the door and taken the darned sunglasses, and you would have  had none of that messy clean up!  She still locks her car.  All my kids do, and now I have joined the ranks of lockers.  We will see just how long it lasts.

My friend, Dallas, at Namaste Cafe made this poster and I am using it with her full consent. Who does not love a cute orange kitty speaking our mind for us? As we say in my family, put on your happy pants!

I am not the paranoid sort of person.  I do not think anyone is out to get me, except for those who I know are out to get me.  I do not think people are watching me, or talking about me behind my back, once again with the exception of those who I know are doing just that.  I would love to never mention cyber stalking or harassment again, and yet on it goes, and I take the appropriate measures, and go about my life, but that is not enough.  It is not enough because I know of several other women who are being stalked and harassed online.  It is not enough because teenagers are killing themselves because someone was stalking, harassing, and bullying them in an online settings.

When another teenager takes his or her own life because of relentless cyber-bullying, we all share articles, or videos, or write blogs about hate, but it is time to stop and think about where these young bullies and stalkers are learning their tricks.  The people stalking and harassing me are all of the ages 50 years and up, with two being in their 70’s.  We bemoan the behavior and hatred of the current generation of young people, but they are learning that behavior somewhere, and it is probably right at home.  Is life really so dull that adult people have nothing better to do than stalk and harass people they do not even know?   My life is plenty busy, and very happy, and I also have no desire to go hating on anyone.  I am going to sit here and think of how I could possibly be enticed into hating on someone, or stalking someone, I do not even know.  Enjoy an image of my cat sleeping downstairs while I think…

Yes, she is a big girl. She’s a pretty girl, too!

Okay, I thought about it and I can think of absolutely nothing that could entice me enough to harass, stalk, or otherwise hate on someone I do not know.  I have a hard time doing that with the people I do know.  That is because 99% of  the people I do know are totally lovely people.  I do admit to keeping my eye on a few from the other team from time to time, but that is just to be safe.  It is usually right about at this point in the discussion that I expect someone to leave a comment on the law of attraction–what you focus on is what you attract.  Here are my thoughts on that.  I believe that being happy and positive and optimistic  with get you far, so will hard work.  I do not believe that turning a blind eye to something will make it disappear.  I also do not think that if I visualize something I want hard enough and long enough and with as much love as I can muster that it will appear at my front door.  Were this true, Robert Redford would be outside chopping wood for me and would be walking in any minute to ask me what delicious meal I had in store for him tonight before he heads out to buy me something lovely and eco-friendly.  Please enjoy this picture of what I see when I look out my window while I actually go look out of my window…

I know. I am a lucky gal!

Bob is not out there!  Thirty plus years of visualizing him and wanting him badly have not made him appear!  I guess it is nachos tonight, as the child wishes.  I believe in God.  I believe that God is protecting me and that He is using me for His message and that He wants you all to know what He knows.  There is evil in the world and we cannot make it go away by ignoring it.  We also cannot participate in it, no matter how tempting it may be.

We need to love more.  We need to put our cell phones down and love on our kids, and pay attention to them when we take them to the playground.  Get out of your car!  Take your face out of your phone and notice that your 4 and 5-year-old children are running around pretending to shoot everyone in sight, and you keep ignoring them when I ask them to please stop.  Turn off your computer and go outside and see the beauty out there. Get off of your rear end and do something to show someone that you love them.

If you want to talk politics with me, tell me why you love a certain candidate, not why you hate the other.  I do not talk hate politics. Your kids are listening to your every word.  They are seeing your every action.  They are learning from you, and too many are learning hate.  Enough is enough.  Here is a trite saying that I really DO believe.  Be the change you want to see!

If you are as tired as I am of hatred and bullying and harassment in the world, YOUR world, stop ignoring it.  If you ignore it you are tacitly endorsing it.  Stop talking hate.  Talk about what you love, show love, be loving.  Be out in the world and be loving.  Do not get sucked into stalking someone for a friend.  What kind of friend would ask you to do that in the first place?

Act like a good person.  Be a good person so that your kids can learn how to be good people.  If you want to change the world, then go out there and throw around as much love as you possibly can, but at the same time, be willing enough, and brave enough, to stand up to bad behavior when you see it.  I want to end this post on a positive note and so I will finish with this….I baked peanut butter cookies last night!  Oooh, peanut butter cookies!!  Now go enjoy your day!


14 thoughts on “Nothing can annoy ya like a case of paranoia—cyberstalking!

  1. Kudos to you in not letting the harassment bring you down! I do hope it abates soon, but I admire you for speaking out in the meantime.

    • KJ, even if it doesn’t abate soon, and it move to Twitter tonight, I will not let it bring me down. I do not take this personally. Whatever this is about is not about me. While it is being directed at me, the person doing this is somehow sick or hurting, or both. I cannot make her all better. I can pray for her, and the whole lot of them, and I do that every night.

  2. Love the truth in this: “The people stalking and harassing me are all of the ages 50 years and up, with two being in their 70’s.”

    Harassment: it’s not just for kids.

    Based on the post today, I think I may have done haters. And yet if the person recognized herself, well…maybe something good will come of it.

    I’m with you about loving the ones we’re with. I’m off to do that now. 😉

  3. Thank you, Renee. Nope, cyber-harassment is not just for kids anymore and the fastest growing population among those engaging in this behavior is adult women. It is crazy and sometimes well beyond that. Serial stalkers, or those in it for the long haul, as usually disordered people. So, I take precautions, but it does not rule my life. Same stuff, different day. She will exhaust herself at some point, or move on.

  4. There will always, always be a few in our lives who will not be happy when we find peace or joy. Some of them will actively work to pull us down to their level of misery. I don’t know why this is. I have tried to figure it out and can honestly say I have been an abysmal failure at it.

    Although there are days when my own active nasties make me sad, angry and even at times want to flee I work hard to try to stand up within my own life. I know you do this too, I think you are doing better at it than I am right now, kudos.

    I loved this, you do so well at pulling our monsters out into the light.

    XX Val 00

    • Val, you are not alone in being unable to figure it out—why people have to be awful to people who are working towards, or have found happiness and peace. I have finally had to conclude that there are just some things that I will never *get* in this lifetime. It is such a different mindset than mine. I had my sad, angry, wanting to run days when this all started. Their goal is to run me off of this blog and anywhere else. It is not going to happen. The more we continue to ignore bad behavior, the more it will flourish—just my opinion. You rock, also, I’d like to add, so be sweeter to yourself,okay? Xoxoxo

  5. You made me those cookies didn’t you?!

    I love your sense of humor, which really comes through in the story about the circus wagon. I am not a big fan of locking doors either, and that annoys my husband (big sigh). I did start locking stuff down recently due to my own harassing grown-up. Like you said, it’s not just children behaving badly. They are indeed often imitating behavior they observe in adults.

    Darn, I’m sleepy. So sorry about the crap you’re experiencing!! xoxo

    • El, there are always homemade cookies in my home 😉 All you need to do is to drop by! The baloney will end. I may have to do some things I’d rather not do, but it will end. I have faith. Mr. Sheriff was mighty displeased by the broken promise…LOL! Seriously…I hope you got some sleep!

    • Yes, but is anyone listening? I had to make several calls to my little boy’s school last year regarding bullying and these were first graders. At one point, I told the school counselor that is had been 14 years since I’d had a first grader, but had the world really changed so much in the time? She said that thanks to Facebook and the internet, yes, it really had changed that much. The sheriff that I am working with has told me the very same thing. I do not know how we turn it around now at this point, and that is sad.

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