The theory of enough–The (sweetened) condensed version

There is a theory out there that is known as the theory of enough.  The theory of enough basically says that if you have enough that is all that you need, no more, no less.  The Amish practice the theory of enough and it is the basis for a life of simplicity, which I believe is something that could be practiced a whole lot more in our world.  Unfortunately, few of us believe that having enough is really enough.  We always seem to want more.  In countries like America, we have so much few of us have any idea what enough even is in reality.  It has been said that people will strive for more, and getting more will go on to desire even more.  Yet, once they lose it all, they will finally realize that a little was more than enough. That statement is entirely true, or it has been for me.  I am someone who lost it all—what most people would define as “all,” meaning possessions, reputation, and even my freedom.

It was when I had nothing, by society’s standards anyway, that I came to a realization.  I realized that I had my integrity with God, and I had my integrity with myself, and integrity within my personal relationships, and once I knew that one thing, I suddenly realized that I had everything that I needed for a happy and successful life.  I had more than enough, and I had always had more than enough, even at the lowest points in my life. I was loved.

But how does a person even begin to understand enough without losing everything?  Begin by asking yourself if you’ve had enough to eat today—maybe even too much.  Every minute, it is estimated that 15 people in the world die of starvation.  That is around 50,000 people a day, many of them children.  If you had enough to eat today you are blessed, and if there is food for tomorrow and the next day and the next day, then you have more than enough.  I have more than enough food.  I am blessed.  I also chronically cook too much, so I share with others.  I was raised to always cook more than enough in case someone dropped by, then I went on to raise a large family.  I cannot cook for two, so I share my extras.  Since I live a very simple life, it is what I have to give to others, and it is always appreciated.

Do you have a roof over your head, even if it leaks, or you think your house is too small, or it is in the wrong neighborhood?  In the United States there are over 600,000 people who are homeless, and that includes many, many families with children.  If you have a home and food and clothes on your back, even if they aren’t the latest style, you have enough.  Most of us have more than enough clothes, and shoes, and toys, and books, and stuff.  So much so that we have to work harder to buy bigger houses to store all of our stuff.  As a result, most of us have way more than enough stress in our lives, so we eat too much, or drink too much to try and cope with having to keep up with keeping up.

Now, lest you think I am going to tell you to sell all of your stuff and go live in a little cottage in the woods because if you don’t you are a greedy, selfish, glutton, or you are thinking that I have never had anything more than a little cottage in the woods so I have no idea what I am talking about when it comes to the greatness of having lots of stuff, let me tell you that I have lived on both ends of the spectrum.

My first husband is a surgeon.  He made a lot of money. He probably still does 😉 We lived in a 4500 square foot house filled with expensive furniture, and knick knacks, and doodads, and a very expensive Victoria art glass collection.  I had lots of lovely jewelry, mostly diamonds, and we had nice cars.  In my second marriage, for reasons I cannot fully comprehend, we lived in abject poverty, with no heat in the winter, no working bathroom, no washing machine, and in the end, no running water.  At one point, I had one pair of pants to my name that I had to wash by hand in the sink every few days.  I have truly looked at life from both sides now…  There is a middle ground in there.  There is a balance we can reach and it is called enough.

Not only do not think that we have enough, at the very root of it, we do not think that we are enough.  We are not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, funny enough, thin enough, liked enough, and the list goes on and on.  We wouldn’t have a “not enough” list if we didn’t compare ourselves to others so much, but we do it relentlessly.  Our eyes are always focused on others, and the exterior things in life.  This draws us right into the cycle of striving harder to have more because certainly you will finally be enough if you have more cool clothes, or drive a nicer car, or have a bigger house, or get thinner, or work harder, and have more fancy stuff right?  Wrong!

You will be enough when you look inside of yourself and decide that you are enough already.  You will realize that you are enough when you stop comparing yourself to others and begin to love yourself for who you are now.  That doesn’t mean that you can’t, and shouldn’t, make improvements if they are needed, but knowing that you are enough will give you the strength and courage to make those changes.  Once you realize that you are enough, some truly amazing things will happen.  You won’t be so busy looking around at everyone else, comparing yourself to them.  That will free your eye, heart, and mind up enough to look around you and see all of the people in your life who love you for who you are, and you will have relaxed enough to love them far better, and more honestly.

As time goes on, you will also begin to know that you have more than enough and you may reset some priorities.  You will worry a lot less, and care about others a whole lot more.  You will begin to take notice of all of the people who really do not have enough in their lives, be it food, housing, clean water, clothing, love, or attention, and you will want to reach out and share with those who do not have enough because suddenly your life has become an embarrassment of riches.

Your world will become much bigger, and far more colorful, and happy, and filled with joy.  Life will simply feel lighter and less burdensome.  You won’t need as much from the outside because you will be at peace on the inside.  You will be enough, and have enough every day, and love enough every chance you get.  You will live in the moment, because each moment we are given to love God, and ourselves, and others will become a precious gift.  Isn’t that really the heart of enough?

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5 thoughts on “The theory of enough–The (sweetened) condensed version

  1. Absolutely right on as far as focusing inward to discover self-worth and value!! I did not know how rough things were in your second marriage — gah! I never liked poverty. But wealth has never guaranteed that I’d be happy either. For me, though, having a basic level of financial security and stability has made a big difference in my ability to handle anxiety. That need, of course, doesn’t take away from your larger point–that we must find enough by calculating what lies on the inside.

    • I never liked poverty, either. In fact, it stunk quite a bit. I agree that a certain level of financial security does squelch a lot of anxiety, but as long as I can pay my bills, and we have all our essential needs met, and enough to something a little fun now and than, I am fine. But yes, the true enough has to come from the inside, and the total belief that God will provide. Xoxoxo

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